Friday, October 22, 2010

No Boundaries

They say I have no boundaries
like I can't be contained
well to an extent their right
because I live by faith
I'll set the world on fire, any time any place
I do it all for the glory of God that makes
me just a servant on my way
doin what I'm supposed to do
Hail Mary pace
full of joy face
relate to all people
catholic ways
but sometimes the catholic weight
of stuck prejudgement gets in my space
like dang is it really one of those days?
I get resistance for the way I share my faith
what I say is sacred..... okay
I wouldn't say it if it was fake...... okay
I come bearing truth
which you can leave or take
ohhh... it too much
sorry! Please don't dislike me
my language isn't harming
quite the contrary
it's the harvest I'm farming
to just raise your vision above the crops to the top
Lord I'm giving you my all, everything I got
be with me when I fall
don't let me prayers stop
for in your word I reside
it is my are my light
a lamp unto my feet
but now I gotta sleep
Amen to you... I do believe

Friday, October 15, 2010

Radical Reflection Causes Internal Tension

There are times when my heart is conflicted due to the reception of my radical ways of expressing my faith. I pray that all hearts are changed to glorify God. Including my own.

I am aware my faith is different. My relationship with God isn’t average by any means. The lens I see God and the way He works is a gift. However, sometimes for others it’s hard to be open to this perspective. I gave a reflection yesterday to 1000 high school students and teachers in which I broke down the 1st four years of Mary’s life in as if she was currently in high school. I described how frightening it might have been to witness an angel telling you that you will become pregnant with the Son of God when you have no relations with a man. I then expressed that the Angel Gabriel said not to worry that they Holy Spirit would come upon her and take care of business. Sure some listening may consider that statement a bit radical or tasteless… but I’m not really bending the truth by any means. That actually happened. It’s the concept is not normal, in fact it’s out of this world....but it's God's concept, not mine! It doesn’t make sense to the human being… seems impossible. I wanted my listeners to grasp the concept that God calls us to higher things even when we don’t understand it. It is our faith that will always provide clarity. I then proceeded to explain how Mary traveled 80 miles with her husband Joseph while being extremely pregnant in order to give birth to Jesus in Bethlehem. I can’t imagine a pregnant woman traveling that far much less on a donkey. Then I touched on Jesus beginning teething at the age of 1-2.

Sometimes we don’t know what the reality is unless we put ourselves in the position to receive the truth. That’s was my plan of attack to allow students to feel what mary felt in ordinary human terms. I had no intention of downplaying the sacredness of this event that jumpstarted the redemptive work of Christ.

Currently, I’m struggling because I believe that the Holy Spirit inspired my perspective and helped me write my reflection. I have ran into these issues before where I feel I’m doing exactly what God wants me to do but it doesn’t fit the norm of society. There are times when I feel that my faith is too radical for some. I am unsure if I should tone it down or remain true to who I am. When these issues came to my attention I of course turn directly to prayer. Whenever I’m in conflict I’d rather go to my advocate and counselor, the Holy Spirit, in hopes to receive comfort and direction.

I recall in college when I rapped in Mass some people didn’t approve, & others enjoyed it. Yesterday, when I spoke I believe a lot of student took valuable messages away from my reflection and some were turned off. When looking at my situation and comparing it to Christ… I think he probably experienced an internal storm as well. Many people heard Christ teaching some connected with the truth and others rejected it immediately. He had a lot of followers, and he had a lot of people who were against him. In yesterday’s reading Jesus said, Blessed are you when they insult you and persecute you and utter every kind of evil against you (falsely) because of me.Rejoice and be glad, for your reward will be great in heaven.

Maybe I’m experiencing the Gospel live. Maybe I do need to change my perspective on the way I express my faith. I am turning 25 years old and feel extremely developed in my faith however, still feel I have the faith of a child.

I’m not stubborn in who I am. I always ready to be molded and changed. That’s part of my covenant with God. Take me as I am… Show me Your Plan. Lord it is my prayer that I may work through this conflict and Glorify you in all I do and say. Praise be your holy name always.

-JM